Father-Daughter, Mother-Son relationship

We dont realize the role of opposite sex parent in their child's life especially at adolescence. Generally, we think father plays a major role in their son's life and mother plays a vital role in daughter's life. However, they both play equal role either in their son or daugther's life. The important thing is that opposite sex parent-child relationship acts as a template when it comes to relationship or when they choose their life-partner. In short, masculine and feminine in each of us have to be balanced. Get married with the masculine and feminine within you. Feminine is like moon, weather, nature - keep changing and dynamic. Masculine is like sun - slow and steady changing

Father-daughter relationship:
Some of the qualities girls can acquire when their father plays a positive role in their life: Respect, appreciate, approval, positive attitude towards feminine sexuality, embracing the masculine qualities (providing, steady, freedom, stability, strength, integrity, focus)
Qualities acquired due to negative role of their father: abusive, unavailabilty, neediness (trying to get attention)
For example: If the father respects his wife and daughter, the girl may grow with the positive thought that guys respect women and she finds a guy who can respect her and her feminine power. When the father approaches the feminine positively, she is proud of herself being a female. When the father is unavailable to his wife or daughter, she looks for love from someone else, leading to abusive relationships in her adolescence. When the father is unavailable, she looks for a man subconciously who is unavailable. She has a image in her mind about how the father should be and shouldnt be. Whatever she dont want from her father impacts her more, get mixed in her feelings and thoughts. She resists those qualities so much to the extent that she attracts similar man in her life. The sad thing is, even if she meets a guy who can love her genuinely, she will run away from it. Because its a new feeling for her, she never experienced. Due to the fear towards unknown or to face the new encounter, she get overwhelmed and run away from the guy who loves her so much. She again end up with the guy who has similar traits of her father, because she prefers safe to be in a situation which she got used from childhood.
Dear Fathers, its in your hand to bring up your girl to attract the man who appreicates her, loves her, repects her, listens to her and available to her. You may play a negative role without knowing, but that can break your lovely girl's future. Its the time to take a concious effort for better relationship.

Mother-son relationship:
Qualities a son can aquire from a positive mother: respecting feminine, understanding menstrual cycle, child birth, menopause, respecting women, expressing emotions, receiving love, discussing problems. In short, they touch their feminine side (emotion, intuition, receptive, patience, gentleness, listening, nurturing).
Qualities a son can acquire when their mother play a negative role: Examples: When the mom is controlling, dominating or trying to correct him, he wants to be free. When the mom is keep complaining. he is not ready to listen to his partner. When the mom is possessive, he fears the love from his partner that the love may come with expectations which he cant fulfil.

Hence both the parents have important role in their child life. You kids are separate adn complete being. Dont force your missings, unfulfilled desires, expectations on them. Let them to live freely, to choose what they love. Let them to make mistakes and learn. Whenever they need or they come to you, give your full heart. Be there for them and support them instead of changing them or accusing them for their mistakes.

Universe Loves You and Responds to You

Many times, in our life, we would have thought that we are put in the same situation again and again. For example, always ending up with unavailable man/woman or cheating friends/partners, always working so hard to earn money, etc. Facing the same type of situations or problems or people doesn't mean universe/god/nature is punishing you. It just helps you to look at yourself by giving the same scenarios until you face the situations, learn and let go. For example, you try so hard to get money. It probably comes from your belief that no pain, no gain, or money can’t be obtained easily. Another example is ending up with unavailable woman or man. It’s because you yourself are unavailable to love or fearing love or very needy for love. The man/woman you meet just reflect the quality what you have inside. But you may be not aware that you possess that quality. You are what you feel and what you think, not what you speak. So observe the feeling within you. When you meet unavailable person, turn inward. Look at the unavailability or needy behaviour inside you. Accept it and let go. Change your belief, feelings and thoughts. Then your world will suddenly change. You meet people who love you. 

Hint: You give yourself of what you expect from other (self-love, self-respect). You become the source of your own happiness. Like attracts like. So now you meet people who love and respect you.

Lunaception - Natural Contraception and Regulation of Menstrual Cycle

These days, women take contraceptive pills or use intrauterine devices for contraception. Some women do take pills to get their cycle just once a year. The technology has even gone to the extent to suppress the menstrual cycles with the new no-period, no-PMS birth control pills because the society merely sees the menstrual cycle as a physical process. However, it is the centre of women’s life, men’s life, relationship as well as the entire cosmos. But now our life is centred with the pills to control this beautiful natural cycle artificially.  The main reason is that we don’t pay attention to our body’s needs, emotional needs. We are just stressed due to the discordance between the need to live like a man (masculine qualities: rationality, competitive, etc.) to survive in this society and the internal quest within us to have a touch with our feminine (creativity, intuition, being with yourself, etc.). Moreover, long term intake of hormonal tablets may also affect our health. Lunaception refers aligning your menstrual cycle with moon cycle for regulating the cycle as well as for natural contraception. I explain this process very short and easy to understand, so that we can connect with this beautiful monthly process of death and rebirth (menstrual cycle) to connect with our body, heart, soul, nature and the man of our life. For more detail please read the book Lunaception by Louise Lacey.

In short, we control or balance our hormonal cycles with lights. By nature, we are tuned to get our cycle during the new moon and ovulate in full moon. From first day to 13nth day of our cycle, please sleep in absolute darkness where we can’t even see our fingers. Please even stay away from blue lights of electronic items in your bedroom too. From 14nth day (third day of your vaginal wetness) to 16nth day, sleep with light on. Switch on the light in the hall way or in the bathroom and let little light to come into the bedroom to mimic the full moon light while you ovulate. Again sleep in complete darkness from day 17 until day 14 of your next cycle. Practise this for 6 months to one year. Soon your cycle will coincide with the moon cycle.

To avoid pregnancy, just don’t have sex or use protection for the three days while you sleep with light on. Please pay attention that women have the potential to ovulate twice a month. One is normal ovulation (around 14nth day of their menstrual cycle) and another is lunar ovulation. Lunar ovulation is the time of fertility in women when the current moon phase is the moon phase of the day she was born. Lunar ovulation is independent of the ovulation in her hormonal cycle. We are more fertile in the moon phase we born. So when you don’t want pregnancy consider both the ovulation.

How the lights we are exposed at night affect our hormonal system: The moon light detected by our eyes reaches pineal gland and regulates the level of melatonin. Melatonin level has direct effect on our reproductive cycle including beginning of menstrual cycle (menarche – the first menstrual cycle in women’s life), ending of menstrual cycle (menopause – the last menstrual cycle), duration as well as frequency of our monthly cycle. Exposure to light at night controls the melatonin production, which in turn affects the function of hypothalamus and its ability to regulate our hormonal system. 

Menstrual Cycle (Cycle of Creativity or Cosmic Cycle) and basic nature of women

Menstrual Cycle (Cycle of Creativity or Cosmic Cycle) and basic nature of women – Introducing women’s world to men to walk together happily

Once you hear menstrual cycle (the cycle of creativity), you may think that this post is for women. Yes, it’s for women. But I mainly write this for men to help them to walk in women’s world confidently. As we all know menstrual cycle is a normal process in woman's body. However it’s always a hidden topic. Many of teen girls and boys, and men as well go through hard time in relationship due to lack of awareness in this topic. Especially this lack of awareness affects the most intimate relationship on this earth i.e., husband and wife. Many men are into menstruation, they like to know more about it to understand the woman they date, to help their girlfriends in schools, etc. But they are afraid to talk about it. It may be due to the following reasons: 1. The society still considered it as a taboo. 2. Women may not like to share or may get embarrassed. In many societies, women don’t even talk about it to other women. Some women are extreme that they don’t communicate even to their potential future guy or husband. Still the society or women itself consider this sacred cycle as unclean, dirty or a curse. Most mothers introduce the monthly cycle as a curse (e.g., you have to put up this as a woman) to their daughters when they get their first cycle. But they don’t realize that this one sentence makes them to be ashamed of their own sexuality at that innocent age. Occasionally, some women like to share e.g., if guy friends are calling out. But they are afraid to communicate it openly because they think guys may not like to hear about it, guys can’t understand, etc. Hence i am here to break that taboo and create a new bond between men and women.

In this universe, everything is rhythmic (cycle) e.g., life (birth to death), weather, planets orbiting, sun revolving around earth, waxing and waning phases of moon and women too. Women go through different phases of menstrual cycle. Men may also go through cyclic hormonal changes, but may be without bleeding, who knows. I have read that men also experience irritable male syndrome due to monthly hormonal changes and male-menopause (andropause) around the age 45-55. If they pay attention to their physical and emotional part, they can track their mood swings. (Its just my view, but may not be true. Because I believe everything in this universe is cyclic). Menstrual cycle is not just a physical process, it’s also emotional. In general, women are more emotional than men. All their unhealed emotions come up with during their cycle. Hence, their life and their moods are revolving around their cycle. If women pay attention to these cyclic nature to understand themselves and when you both communicate this cyclic event to feel the bond created between you two, you can share a different level of intimacy i.e., both of you start to speak each other’s language. It can almost solve all misunderstanding between men and women. Menstrual cycle is a power or boon to women. They are more intuitive during their bleeding time. It’s a new beginning and the time to let go of all unwanted emotions. Miranda Gray and Dr. Christiane Northrup are some of the best women's writer (I added the link at the sidebar). To know more about the four phases on the emotional side, please go to these links:

Creative gifts of menstrual cycle and Let's go menstrual.

In short, the four phases of menstrual cycles are

1. Menstrual phase (Reflective phase) (Day 1 to 6) (Winter) (Dark/New moon)

2. Follicular phase (Dynamic phase) (Day 7 -13) (Spring) (Waxing moon)

3. Ovulation phase (Expressive phase) (Day 14-20) (Summer) (Full moon)

4. Premenstrual phase (Creative phase) (Day 21 - 28) (Autumn) (Waning moon)

Phase 1 or Week 1:

New beginning, new ideas, inwardly focused, planting new seeds, death and rebirth, renewal, review, meditate, having rest, do what you love, nature walk, red tent, draw or paint, be kind to yourself, accepting, going with the flow, enjoying

Phase 2 or Week 2:

Concentration, expressing sexuality, full of energy, excited, stamina, learning, beautifying yourself, logical thinking, planning, independence, multi-tasking

Phase 3 or Week 3:

Supportive, empathy, want to let go of unwanted emotions, communication, team work, relation to others

Phase 4 or Week 4:

Feel ready to let go and fully surrender, less emotional availability, inspiration, identifying what you want next and what you don’t want now, creative, intuitive

Above are the basic patterns women may feel during different phases of their monthly cycle. Because many women don’t listen to their physical/emotional needs because of busy schedule etc., they don’t release their emotional baggage. Though they may like to slow down and have rest, they push themselves to work due to society structure or to prove they are not weak and equal to men. They just deny their internal voice without awareness.

Apart from cyclic, everything in this nature is dual as well. Birth and death, creation and destruction, good and bad, dark and night, yin and yang (men and women), pain and pleasure, waxing and waning, new moon and full moon etc. In this physical world, one can’t be perceived without another. They are not opposite, but complementary. Please understand that men and women are different from masculine and feminine. Masculine and feminine are just qualities. There can be men who are in touch with their feminine nature and women who are intimate with the masculine side. But both the qualities have to be balanced to feel peace with yourself and in your relationships.

Examples of some feminine qualities: receptive, creative, sensuality, intuitive, surrender, flow (cyclic/keep changing), nurturing, patient, let go, empathy, patience, expressive, vulnerable, gentle, compassion, allowing, be happy for others

Examples of masculine qualities: rational, independent, stable, protecting, determination, initiating, providing, courage, decisive, endurance, confident, ambitious

Guys, to give you little bit more idea of how women think, I write some basic nature of women:

1. Women are emotional. If something happens, they may react immediately. But it may last only few hours or a day. (Very few percentage girls can use silence as a revenge).

2. Women cry easily for small problems or keep talking about the problems just to reduce the intensity of pain, but not to complain. So please don’t misunderstand it.

3. Almost no girl can take the silence of a guy. If any problem (even mistakes made by girls), let them know directly and politely. Soon they will accept their mistake and ask you sorry. They can tolerate even if you burst out, but not the silence. They feel as if they are not respected or ignored.

4. Sometimes they feel they are indecisive. Many centuries, either father, brother, boyfriend or husband take care of their needs. Please give them suggestion.

5. Just get to know their cycle. By knowing it, you can know their health, their moods. Just before the period, if they get irritated, you can tell them it’s due to emotional disturbance. Soon they will understand because many girls are not even aware of it.

6. Don’t tease them with their cycle. Empower them.

7. Especially first two days of their cycle, they may need an hour to look into themselves. They like to have rest and slow down their life. Most girls are taught that their cycles are curse, not gender fare. All their past relationship problems, childhood trauma can come up and manifest as physical pain. Try to be positive with them saying menstrual cycle is powerful, connect with their feminine nature. Encourage them to see their emotions or ask them to share with you if they want. In few months your girl's emotional and physical pain will be almost reduced. 

8. If they are physically comfortable or willing, offer them to have intimacy with you. Sex may help to relieve from the cramp.

9. The most simple way to touch your woman’s heart is get them their feminine product. I know you may ask they can buy for themselves. Women just like to test that you are masculine enough to buy them their feminine products and your positive view towards feminine nature.

10. It is not true that girls/society thinks guys are weak if they speak emotions. If any problem in relationship, you want a change or you don’t like some aspect of your partner or their life style, be open to them politely. If you hide it in your heart, they will get confused. Open and honest communication is the key for relationship.

11. If small fight or misunderstanding, just hug them. They become usual immediately. Girls often love to be kissed, hugged or cuddle if they are disturbed.

12. Talk about your physical, emotional, sexual needs directly, instead of expecting from heart.

13. If any problem, try to know their childhood and past. Most of the problems come from predetermined idea from their father or other guys in their life.

14. Girls have no idea of your certain behaviour. You need to look at your own emotions sometimes. Tell them openly why you behaved in certain way for a situation (if any problem). If they know the reason behind your reaction, it’s easy for them to know you. Emotionally helping each other is the key.

Note to women about the fundamental reason for the behaviour of today’s men:

Dear Women,

You don’t need to change yourself like a man to survive in this society, unless it’s your authentic self. Do what you love. Most men fall in love with your feminine nature. Sometimes men don’t have touch with their emotions. For many centuries they involved in war (soul has the memory of previous lives). The society also expects them to be strong and not to speak their emotions (considered as a sign of weakness). Sometimes they may freak out with blood (for men seeing blood is related to disease or accident), they may not involve in your cycle. But now they put much effort to know you better, to involve in child rearing, household works, etc. They start to access their feminine qualities. They require time to transform themselves. Be kind to them.

Gathering with other women and sharing your experiences can provide you profound healing. You can include men if they are interested and comfortable.

Thank you for women who read this post and become ready to help men in their life.

Note to men about the fundamental reason for the behaviour of today’s women:

Dear Men,

Women are too emotional. Sometimes they are even needy, clingy, indecisive or doubtful. As women rights are forgiven for many centuries, they actively take up the feminist role to fight for their rights. Even today, in many cultures, they are fighting for their basic rights like to study, to choose the guy they love, to go for a work, to pay the groom’s family at the time of marriage, etc. They are not comfortable with their own body and they are ashamed of their sexuality. They consider they are cursed to be women because they are getting their period and they go through pregnancy because it’s not gender fare. They consider feminine as weak. They want to become like a man. Instead of thinking femininity as empowering womanhood, many women misunderstood femininity as opposing the authentic masculine. So they try to change you and prove to you there are superior because they themselves still feel inferior. Now it’s changing. Please give them the time to transform. Empower them. Kindly express them their emotional irritability and the reasons (past, influence from father or other men). Get to know their phase of the menstrual cycle to feel them more. Ask them to take some time for themselves to heal the emotional pain that are coming up during their cycle to reduce their physical pain and balance their mood.

Thank you for men who read this and ready to help women in their life.

A note to men and women:

Now please men and women work together on their journey. I hope this post may help someone to have an amazing relationship with his/her beloved. Because without enough knowledge, being girl i myself freaked out when i got my first cycle. I have gone through severe physical and emotional pain during my cycle. To have an enjoyable life on earth, men and women have to help each other with patience. Love is patience. Love is detachment. Love is unconditional. Love is fearlessness. Love just gives without expectations. There is no scale to weigh love and give it to other in a balanced way. Some people tend to overgive, it’s their way to express love. Some people are shy or reserved, it’s their way of expressing love. Over-giving and being shy/reserved are just different ways to express love. Please you both respond to the problems instead of reacting immediately. Accept the differences as complementary instead of thinking there is nothing common. Ready for the change and explore each other’s world out of love. See life together as "we", not individually. Respect/value each other’s opinion. You both are independent as well as co-dependent. So dance together for happy life. Thank you for your time to read this post.

More links to know about internal (emotional) process women go through during their monthly cycle, how to embrace it to heal their emotional and physical pain, spiritual practise of menstrual cycles in ancient times, magic of menstrual blood in arts, rituals, relationships and fertilizing the earth and plants are given in the sidebar.

Meditations

      Meditation:

1.      I align with my higher self (soul). 

2.      My heart radiates love to everyone.

3.      I am the flame of living god/goddess.

4.      I love the man/woman I am becoming.

5.      I love myself to love my guy/girl because he/she is the physical manifestation of my inner masculine/feminine.

6.      Me and my life-partner are one. To experience the life on this earth, one soul manifested as two physical realities.

7.      I have all the power to create my reality. I take my power back when I feel I am powerless. I am the co-creator of my life with the universe (or god or nature or whatever you believe).

8.      I love myself. I honor myself. I respect myself. What I do to myself is what I do to others. So everything starts and ends within me.

9.      We all are one. We are beyond measure, societies limitations. We are beyond our thoughts, feelings, and emotions.

10. We all are under the umbrella of love. Sky is the roof and mother earth is the floor of our house. There are no differences, differences due to caste, religion, race, nations or culture. 

11. I am free, liberated, powerful, infinite, multi-dimensional and divine.

12. I balance the masculine and feminine qualities in me.

13. I am open to change (new beginning).

14. I am attracted to the man/woman I love.

15. My thoughts and my intentions create my reality. So I take responsibility of my life. I change my inner world (how I react to situations) to change the external circumstances. 

16. I receive love in all forms (fear, love, honest, Valentine’s Day gift, etc.).

17. I love myself and the whole world as different aspects of myself. Entire world loves me and values me.

18. I release my resistance. I flow with the nature of life. Everything comes to me easily.

19. I am beyond limitations and definitions. Its only me who is limiting/defining myself based on my/others opinion.

20. I live my life authentically (from my heart).

21. I listen to my intuitions. I pay attention to my body, heart, mind, and soul.

22. I deserve love. 

23. The love to myself (self love) is self care, but not selfish.

24. I believe/trust myself.

25. I choose to love everyone irrespective of their actions.

26. I love the person I am. I accept the person I am.

27. I allow myself to learn from mistakes. My fears, mistakes and negative aspects actively guiding me to become better.

28. I am unique.

29. I live in the now. I don’t define myself with my past experiences. I don’t run towards the unclear future.

30. I accept the brightest and darkest side of my soul.

31. Its okay to have failures, unfulfilled expectations, breaks up.

32. I feel both happiness and pains. They are just moving energy or passing clouds. So I accept them patiently.

33. I forgive myself.

34. I forgive others to forgive myself. (what I send to the world is what I receive from myself and the world)

35. I have enough time, enough money, good friendship, good family and loving life partner.

36. I am confident to live my life from my heart.

37. I embrace my darker side. Without existence of dark, there is no light.

38. I am happy as a being.

39. Its okay to spend a day without purpose. Its okay to get lost in the life path. Its okay to feel unloved.

40. I am an empowered man/woman.

41. I accept new people into my life and I let go of the people who wants to leave my life for my/their highest good.

42. I respect masculine and feminine equally.

43. I am whole, grounded, and centered.

44. I have good relationship with me because I project to the world what is inside of me.

45. I accept my imperfections because it gives me opportunity to know myself and helps me to grow.

46. I give myself permission to experience both success and failures.

47. If something happens I look into myself for answers. I look for the vibrations within me that created repulsion with my one.

48. I love my love of my life to the extreme that I can let go of him/her for his/her happiness.

49. I balance myself to balance my relationship with others.

50. I appreciate/thank everyone in my life. I appreciate and thank animals, plants, nature. We all are connected.

Meditations for women to physically manifest her inner masculine:

1.      I accept all aspects of myself and all aspects of my guy.

2.      I love my man with all my heart. I care/value/respect/trust him. I listen to his needs.

3.      My man is simple. He cares me, values me, and respects me. He loves me with all his heart.

4.      My man listens to me. He empowers me. He is emotionally expressive. He loves his family.

5.      I am receptive to his emotions. I am approachable to him.

6.      I look at myself first when things are wrong. I detach myself from the emotions and see his perspective.

7.      I love/accept my man for who he is at the core, without changing him to what i expect him to be.

8.      I feel one with him. I am transparent / express myself (bright and dark side) to him gracefully without the fear of being judged and without making him responsible.

9.      I give him advice/space when he needs or asks for it.

10. I always be there for him irrespective of life situations (pain and pleasure).

11. I appreciate/thank him for his love to me.

12. I express my raw feminine essence to him.

13. We accept we and our needs are keep changing. We communicate our physical/emotional needs openly without the fear of being judged. We dance together with the dynamic of the relationship.

14. I am stable when situations are intricate.

15. I connect/listen to my heart, soul, body, womb and yoni.

16. My womb and yoni, the sacred path connects me to my one in this physical world. It opens my inner wisdom and connects me to the mystery of this universe.

17. Cyclic nature is my power. I embrace my menstrual cycle and giving birth as my eternal connection with my one. I slow down myself and take rest during my cycle. I reflect on myself and let go of all unwanted emotions that don’t serve for my soul expansion.

Welcome

Dear Readers,

I welcome you all to my blog. I start this blog with the intention of sharing the path I have gone through in search of myself. I believe this sharing can help many people, so that they can skip the process of going through confusion, depression, etc when they want to connect with themselves.

Thank you for reading my blog.

Life Quotes

1.      You are your universe.

2.      Only you can feel yourself. Only you can love yourself. Only you can motivate yourself. Only you can judge yourself. Only you can hurt yourself.

3.      We all are connected energetically as one. So one's thought or vibration can reach everyone.

4.      Love for love's sake.

5.      Love someone to the extreme that you can let go of them for their happiness because the separation is only for this physical body. In energy/vibration, you are eternally connected with them.

6.      Let go of people who wants to leave your life. Invite new people who want to share their life with you.

7.      You are creating your reality.

8.      People are coming into your life only with your invitation and for a reason.

9.      Love is the only answer for everything. Love is freedom. Love is detachment. Love is patience. Love is forgiveness. Love is acceptance. Love is letting go. Love is fearlessness.

10. Love, forgiveness, patience, compassion - key elements of life

11. Embrace all aspects of yourself both good and bad. Similarly, embrace all aspects of others as the way they are, not the way you want them to be.

12. Focus on what you feel/want, not what you don't want.

13. The relationship you have with others is the reflection of relationship you have with yourself.

14. True marriage is between the masculine and feminine within you. The girl or guy you meet for relationship is the reflection of that masculine or feminine. So, first get married with yourself.

15. If you don't like the aspect of yourself that feels hurt or think always negatively, that is the aspect requires more love. Love those aspects as much as you can.

16. Connect with the divine God/Goddess within you.

17. By forgiving others you are forgiving yourself. By loving others you are loving yourself.

18. Opposite of love is not hate, but fear. Love is fearlessness, open to vulnerability.

19. Being with yourself is the way to become yourself.